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发表于 2004-3-25 06:59:55
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toss a coin
Why don't you toss a coin, if it is the head, you go to Germany, if it is the tail, then you stay put.
Please excuse me, I am only joking.
You may be a serious person. Let me get serious. I would like to ask, "What is your problem?" I don't quite understand what your problem is. According to my understanding, your problem is that you are facing a dilemma, and you don't know which way to go. You are in a situation in which to go to Germany vs. stay in China, to take the job and make money vs. to study overseas and spend money. You also don't know which one suits you better: a boring but stable life or an uncertain but potentially exciting one. You may feel difficult to make up your mind and I don't blame you. Oh, poor you. When you choose one, you have to give up the other. You can't have it both ways. If this is your problem, I think it is unsolvable. You have the problem because you don't have at least 200 years of life span and all the money to allow you try out every option, so if you don't like the choice you made, you can start all over again. Your problem is that you don't have the luxury to do whatever you want and not to worry about making a living.
To be honest with you, I don't quite understand you and your problems. I never had the same problem or dilemma as you do. When I decided to come to the West, I felt I had to leave China behind, because I was fed up being a Chinese. I just didn't want to be a Chinese any longer. Since I failed to make China a country I'd like to live in and to make China a nation I felt proud to belong to, I didn't want to suffer all its problems and bear its burden on my slim shoulders any more. In order to have the opportunities and freedom only available in the West, I did not hesitate at all to give up everything I had in China: my job -- the best one in many ways, my accommodations, my networks, everything I built up until that point to gamble for a unknown future. Although my life has not been easy and the journey I have been taking is treacherous and full of pitfalls, I never regret. My life is everything and anything but boring. What else does one want?
A lot of friends here suggested that one should choose what one really loves. I wonder how many of you actually made your choice based on what you love rather than what you need. How many of you actually found your own life path. As somebody, who has insisted on doing what I love to do, I can assure you that it is not an easy life. It is not a life for everybody. If it were, we would not have the dilemma. To follow your heart is easier said than done. The contradiction between what we want and what we need is one of the things that make us human beings. |
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我也跟你一样想了很多，然后，就想放弃留学，放弃德国。